The issue of abstinence before marriage is one that causes much debate amongst Christians today. Some claim that abstaining from sex until marriage is unrealistic and unachievable for most people. However, the Bible communicates a clear message on this topic that cannot be ignored.
First and foremost, the Bible is unambiguous that sex outside of marriage is sinful. Passages like 1 Corinthians 6:18 tell us to “flee from sexual immorality” while Hebrews 13:4 warns that “the marriage bed should be kept undefiled.” God designed sex to be enjoyed exclusively within the covenant of marriage between one man and one woman (Genesis 2:24). Any sexual activity outside of this parameter is considered immoral.
In addition, abstaining from sex before marriage is portrayed as the expected behavior for followers of Christ. 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 says that “It is God’s will that you should be sanctified: that you should avoid sexual immorality; that each of you should learn to control your own body in a way that is holy and honorable.” Passages like this indicate that abstinence before marriage should be the norm amongst Christians, not the exception.
Furthermore, the Bible describes the spiritual and practical benefits of abstinence before marriage. It leads to greater intimacy and trust within marriage (1 Corinthians 7:2-5), avoids unnecessary heartache (Proverbs 5:18-20), prevents comparisons between partners (Song of Solomon 8:12), and keeps believers focused on God (1 Corinthians 7:32-35). Abstinence is presented as the wise and prudent choice.
Now certainly abstinence before marriage is challenging; the Bible is clear about the struggle against sexual temptation (1 Corinthians 10:13). But God promises to provide a way out from temptation if we submit our desires to Him (Hebrews 2:18). With the Spirit’s help, believers can exercise self-control (Galatians 5:22-23).
The key is relying on God’s grace daily, avoiding compromising situations, being accountable to other believers, and fleeing from sexual immorality the moment temptation arises (2 Timothy 2:22). Wise dating choices also help, like only dating fellow believers and avoiding being alone together when tempted. God can empower believers to honor Him with their bodies.
In summary, while abstinence before marriage is countercultural today, the Bible presents it as the clear expectation for followers of Christ. God designed sex for marriage and commands against sexual immorality. With the Spirit’s help, believers can honor God with their bodies and reap the blessings of abstinence before marriage.
The Bible speaks plainly – abstinence before marriage is realistic and expected amongst God’s people. By God’s grace, single believers can live lives of sexual purity that glorify Him. And by so doing, they safeguard the intimacy and blessings of marriage God desires for them in the future.
Passages that present abstinence before marriage as the expected behavior include:
– 1 Corinthians 6:18-20 – Our bodies are temples of the Holy Spirit, so we should honor God by fleeing sexual immorality.
– 1 Thessalonians 4:3-5 – God’s will is for us to be sanctified and avoid sexual immorality.
– 2 Timothy 2:22 – We are told to flee from youthful lusts and pursue righteousness, faith, love and peace.
– Titus 2:11-12 – God’s grace empowers us to say no to ungodliness and worldly passions.
Key passages about sexual immorality that abstinence helps avoid:
– 1 Corinthians 6:9-10 – No sexually immoral people will inherit God’s kingdom.
– Galatians 5:19 – Sexual immorality is a sinful act of the flesh.
– Colossians 3:5-6 – Sexual immorality draws God’s wrath.
– 1 Thessalonians 4:7 – God has not called us for impurity but holiness.
– Revelation 21:8 – Sexually immoral have their place in the lake of fire.
Helpful passages about fleeing sexual temptation:
– Genesis 39:7-12 – Joseph fled when tempted by Potiphar’s wife.
– Proverbs 5:3-8 – Avoid the forbidden woman and her seductive words.
– 1 Corinthians 10:13 – God provides a way out from temptation.
– 2 Timothy 2:22 – Flee from youthful lusts.
– James 4:7 – Resist the devil and he will flee from you.
Verses about spiritual and practical benefits of abstinence:
– Song of Solomon 8:12 – Protects exclusivity for spouse.
– 1 Corinthians 7:2-5 – Helps promote intimacy in marriage.
– Proverbs 5:18-20 – Avoids pain and regret.
– 1 Corinthians 7:32-35 – Allows focus on pleasing God.
Passages on God’s grace to resist temptation:
– Psalms 119:9-11 – Hiding God’s word in our heart helps fight sin.
– Matthew 26:41 – We must be spiritually watchful.
– Romans 6:12 – Do not let sin reign in your body.
– Romans 8:13 – By the Spirit we put to death sinful deeds.
– 1 Corinthians 10:13 – God always provides a way out from temptation.
– Philippians 4:13 – We can do all things through Christ who strengthens us.
– James 4:6 – God gives grace to the humble.
– 1 Peter 5:8-10 – Resist the devil, standing firm in faith.
The Bible consistently presents abstinence before marriage as the wise and expected choice for followers of Christ. Sexual purity honors God and reaps great spiritual and practical blessings. With God’s grace and Spirit, believers can successfully pursue lives of holiness, fleeing from sexual temptation when it arises.
While abstinence before marriage is challenging in today’s culture, God both expects and empowers His people to obey His commands. The Scriptures are clear – abstinence before marriage brings glory to God and is a realistic goal for all believers.
