Setting healthy boundaries in our spiritual lives is vital for living out our faith in a godly manner. Boundaries help us determine what behaviors, relationships, and activities are beneficial versus those that may be harmful or distracting. According to the Bible, God desires for His people to pursue holiness and avoid influences that would hinder their walks with Him. While Scripture does not outline specific boundaries that every Christian should follow, it provides principles and guidelines to shape our thinking. When evaluating spiritual boundaries, we should consider if they help us:
- Prioritize our relationship with God – We must set boundaries that protect time reading the Bible, praying, worshiping, and otherwise cultivating intimacy with the Lord. “But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness…” (Matthew 6:33).
- Pursue righteousness – Boundaries can help minimize temptation and create separation from sinful influences. “Clothe yourselves with the Lord Jesus Christ, and do not think about how to gratify the desires of the flesh” (Romans 13:14).
- Exhibit the fruit of the Spirit – Boundaries enable us to walk in step with the Spirit and exhibit His fruit. “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, forbearance, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness and self-control” (Galatians 5:22-23).
- Utilize spiritual gifts – God intends for us to use our spiritual gifts for the edification of the Church. Boundaries prevent activities that would limit opportunities to serve others. “Each of you should use whatever gift you have received to serve others” (1 Peter 4:10).
- Practice wise stewardship – We are called to be wise stewards of our time, talents, and treasures. Boundaries prevent waste and aimless pursuits. “Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity” (Ephesians 5:15-16).
- Engage in Christian fellowship – God designed us for community and spiritual growth with other believers. Boundaries prevent isolation and exclusivity. “Let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together” (Hebrews 10:24-25).
When evaluating if a spiritual boundary is appropriate, we should prayerfully examine if it promotes godliness and aligns with Scriptural principles. Wise boundaries will lead us closer to Christ and support healthy Christian living. Foolish boundaries may simply reflect personal preferences versus actual spiritual wisdom. We must also consider if boundaries are becoming legalistic – restricting behaviors the Bible permits in moderation. The Holy Spirit guides us in pursuing holiness while resting in the grace of the Gospel.
Common areas where Christians set spiritual boundaries include entertainment choices, social media use, relationships, finances, time management, church involvement, and more. For example, to guard their hearts, some Christians choose boundaries like abstaining from R-rated movies, setting a budget for discretionary spending, limiting social media to 30 minutes a day, only dating believers, tithing income to their local church, or taking a Sabbath rest from work weekly. While the specific boundaries may differ between Christians, we all need to proactively establish these “guardrails” in our spiritual walks.
Entertainment Choices
Media consumption can significantly influence our thoughts and behavior, either drawing us closer to or further from God. Christians looking to set healthy spiritual boundaries with entertainment may consider:
- Avoiding shows/movies that normalize immorality – “I will set before my eyes no vile thing” (Psalm 101:3).
- Limiting time spent mindlessly viewing entertainment – “Be very careful, then, how you live – not as unwise but as wise, making the most of every opportunity” (Ephesians 5:15-16).
- Opting for edifying content that reflects biblical values – “Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable – if anything is excellent or praiseworthy – think about such things” (Philippians 4:8).
- Taking breaks from all media on a regular basis – “Be still, and know that I am God” (Psalm 46:10). Unplugging creates space to meditate, pray, and hear God’s voice.
By carefully evaluating their entertainment choices, Christians can steer their minds toward that which is honorable and praiseworthy according to Scripture.
Social Media Use
Social media offers opportunities for community, encouragement, and sharing the Gospel. However, obsessive use can easily become an idol that consumes our affections and attention. Christians looking to set healthy boundaries with social media may consider:
- Limiting total time spent online each day – “Teach us to number our days, that we may gain a heart of wisdom” (Psalm 90:12).
- Taking one day a week totally off from all social media – “There remains, then, a Sabbath-rest for the people of God…Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest” (Hebrews 4:9, 11).
- Avoiding unnecessary arguments or strife online – “Remind them of these things, and charge them before God not to quarrel about words, which does no good, but only ruins the hearers” (2 Timothy 2:14).
- Being cautious about oversharing personal details – “Do not be rash with your mouth, and let not your heart be hasty to utter a word before God” (Ecclesiastes 5:2).
- Fact-checking before sharing articles – “Do your best to present yourself to God as one approved, a worker who has no need to be ashamed, rightly handling the word of truth” (2 Timothy 2:15).
Setting boundaries creates space for the Holy Spirit to lead online interactions rather than reacting in haste or wasting valuable time.
Finances
God calls us to use money and possessions to glorify Him, not become enslaved to pursuing and hoarding earthly wealth. Financial boundaries can combat materialism and keep Christ at the center. Ideas include:
- Tithing a percentage of income to the local church – “Bring the full tithe into the storehouse, that there may be food in my house. And thereby put me to the test, says the Lord of hosts, if I will not open the windows of heaven for you and pour down for you a blessing until there is no more need.” (Malachi 3:10).
- Limiting impulse purchases and avoiding debt – “The rich rules over the poor, and the borrower is the slave of the lender.” (Proverbs 22:7).
- Praying before making major purchases – “You will make your prayer to Him, and He will hear you” (Job 22:27).
- Setting a budget for living generously – “Each one must give as he has decided in his heart, not reluctantly or under compulsion, for God loves a cheerful giver.” (2 Corinthians 9:7).
- Regularly giving to support missions and those in need – “But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?” (1 John 3:17).
Financial boundaries position money to be used for God’s Kingdom purposes rather than distracting our hearts from the Lord.
Relationships
Our closest relationships significantly impact our walks with Christ, for better or worse. Wise relational boundaries protect our connection with God and our testimonies. This may include:
- Only dating and marrying believers – “Do not be unequally yoked with unbelievers. For what partnership has righteousness with lawlessness? Or what fellowship has light with darkness?” (2 Corinthians 6:14).
- Limiting time with friends who negatively influence faith – “Do not be misled: ‘Bad company corrupts good character.'” (1 Corinthians 15:33).
- Investing in Christian community – “And let us consider how we may spur one another on toward love and good deeds, not giving up meeting together, as some are in the habit of doing, but encouraging one another—and all the more as you see the Day approaching.” (Hebrews 10:24-25).
- Speaking graciously and avoiding gossip – “Do not let any unwholesome talk come out of your mouths, but only what is helpful for building others up according to their needs, that it may benefit those who listen.” (Ephesians 4:29).
- Offering forgiveness to those who repent – “Then Peter came up and said to him, ‘Lord, how often will my brother sin against me, and I forgive him? As many as seven times?’ Jesus said to him, ‘I do not say to you seven times, but seventy-seven times.'” (Matthew 18:21-22).
Healthy relational boundaries demonstrate Christ-like love and grace while also keeping our closest circles accountable and aiming toward spiritual maturity.
Time Management
Our days easily fill up with distractions if time is not actively managed around priorities. Setting boundaries with time positions us to be faithful stewards and make the most of opportunities God provides. Ideas include:
- Daily devotional time in Scripture and prayer – “But seek first the kingdom of God and his righteousness, and all these things will be added to you.” (Matthew 6:33).
- Observing a weekly Sabbath rest – “Six days you shall labor, and do all your work, but the seventh day is a Sabbath to the Lord your God.” (Exodus 20:9-10).
- Being quick to say “no” to unnecessary commitments – “For everything there is a season, and a time for every matter under heaven.” (Ecclesiastes 3:1).
- Scheduling time for family, friends, exercise, hobbies, etc. – “I came that they may have life and have it abundantly.” (John 10:10).
- Using a calendar to plan ahead – “Look carefully then how you walk, not as unwise but as wise, making the best use of the time, because the days are evil.” (Ephesians 5:15-16).
Setting boundaries around time creates space for nourishing our spiritual lives while also embracing rest and life-giving activities God intends for His children.
Church Involvement
Regular church participation is vital, but so is setting boundaries regarding expectations and involvement. It is easy to overcommit and burn out without Sabbath margins. Ideas include:
- Attending services weekly – “And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:24-25).
- Serving based on gifting and capacity – “As each has received a gift, use it to serve one another, as good stewards of God’s varied grace.” (1 Peter 4:10).
- Saying “no” when overcommitted – “For I do not understand my own actions. For I do not do what I want, but I do the very thing I hate.” (Romans 7:15).
- Taking occasional breaks from serving – “And he said to them, ‘Come away by yourselves to a desolate place and rest a while.’ For many were coming and going, and they had no leisure even to eat.” (Mark 6:31).
- Finding community in a small group – “Let us hold fast the confession of our hope without wavering, for he who promised is faithful. And let us consider how to stir up one another to love and good works, not neglecting to meet together, as is the habit of some, but encouraging one another, and all the more as you see the Day drawing near.” (Hebrews 10:23-25).
Involvement in church provides opportunities to serve and be equipped for ministry. But boundaries help prevent burnout and position church practices as blessings versus burdens.
Additional Areas to Consider
Beyond the areas described above, Christians may need to establish boundaries in additional facets of life to support spiritual growth. Further examples could include:
- Reading choices – Christian books versus those that may be spiritually unedifying or even harmful.
- Music preferences – Worship music that draws the heart Godward versus music that promotes ungodly themes.
- Alcohol use – Abstaining completely or only in careful moderation.
- Speech and conversation – Avoiding gossip, slander, lies, profanity.
- Work ethic – Not overworking oneself or neglecting Sabbath.
- Ambitions and dreams – Aligning hopes with God’s will versus self-centered gain.
In all things, Scripture exhorts us to approach life with an eternal perspective and live according to God’s standards of righteousness by the power of the Holy Spirit. Boundaries help structure our lives around Kingdom priorities and godly wisdom versus earthly desires and sensibilities. Though boundaries may differ somewhat between Christians, we all do well to proactively establish these “guardrails” through prayer, wisdom, and guidance from Scripture.