Being a godly wife begins with understanding God’s purpose and design for marriage. According to Scripture, marriage is a sacred covenant between a man and a woman modeled after Christ’s relationship with the church (Ephesians 5:22-33). As a wife, your calling is to respect, submit to, and serve your husband – not as a slave or doormat – but as a willing helper and companion. Your marriage is meant to be a living portrait of the gospel through which God’s glory is displayed.
Practically speaking, being a godly wife involves cultivating a gentle and quiet spirit (1 Peter 3:4), being trustworthy and faithful to your husband (Proverbs 31:11-12), putting his needs above your own (Philippians 2:3-4), granting him intimacy freely and joyfully (1 Corinthians 7:3-5), and respecting him always – even when you disagree (Ephesians 5:33). It means pursuing personal growth and godliness through prayer, God’s Word, and Christian fellowship so you can be the woman God created you to be.
A godly wife cherishes her role in the home. She cares well for her children and manages household responsibilities diligently (Titus 2:4-5). Her aim is creating a warm, welcoming environment where her family can flourish physically, emotionally and spiritually. She is industrious, wise, kind, and full of grace and beauty – both inside and out (Proverbs 31:10-31).
Above all, a godly wife follows Christ with all her heart. She models His humility, love and servanthood in every aspect of marriage. Her life and marriage point to the goodness and glory of God. While not perfect, she admits her shortcomings, receives God’s forgiveness, and continues to press on toward maturity in Christ.
Being a godly wife is challenging in our self-centered culture. It requires dying to selfishness daily through the power of the Holy Spirit. But God promises to supply all the grace needed as you follow His design for marriage. When you honor your husband, care for your home, and pursue Christ wholeheartedly, your marriage will be a light that draws many to the Lord.
Cultivating a Gentle and Quiet Spirit
One of the fundamental qualities of a godly wife is having a gentle and quiet spirit. This attitude of the heart is precious in God’s sight and reflects the inner beauty produced by the Holy Spirit (1 Peter 3:4). It’s not weakness or passivity, but gracious strength under control.
A wife with a gentle and quiet spirit is patient and thoughtful. She seeks to understand before judging. She is slow to anger, offense and irritation. She returns good for evil and doesn’t allow bitterness or resentment to take root in her heart (1 Peter 3:9). Her words are measured, purposeful, uplifting and kind (Proverbs 31:26).
Godly wives accept and respect the leadership of their husbands, even when they have differing opinions and perspectives (1 Peter 3:5-6). They don’t insist on having their own way or demand to be the center of attention. With humility, they yield their rights and agenda in order to serve the greater good of their marriage and family.
This gentle and quiet spirit also enables a wife to be a haven of rest for her husband. She creates a peaceful, welcoming home by not nagging, criticizing or quarreling. Her spirit calms the strife and invites unity. She overlooks minor offenses and doesn’t keep a record of wrongs. Her focus stays fixed on God’s purposes rather than her own selfish desires.
Cultivating this spirit is not easy in our self-promoting world. It requires intentionally dying to pride and self-will daily by relying on the Holy Spirit. Time in God’s Word, prayer, and the support of other godly women help wives grow in humility, patience, understanding, and wisdom.
Being Faithful and Trustworthy
A wife of noble character is faithful and trustworthy, both in word and deed (Proverbs 31:11-12). At the heart of this faithfulness is loyalty. A godly wife always has her husband’s back. She is committed to him and their marriage until death parts them.
This means keeping the marriage bed pure and refusing inappropriate relationships with other men (Proverbs 5:15-19). But faithfulness goes far beyond abstaining from sexual immorality. It also means being dependable, reliable and honest in all areas – with money, time, work, words, and more.
Faithfulness requires self-discipline, wisdom and carefulness to avoid compromising situations (Proverbs 2:10-11). A wife protects her mind and heart from impure thoughts and fantasies. She builds strong personal boundaries and avoids environments or friendships that could weaken her commitment to her husband.
A faithful wife also watches her words (Proverbs 31:26). She never speaks negatively about her husband to others or compares him to other men. She does not flirt or act charmingly around other men. Her speech strengthens trust in her marriage.
Overall, faithfulness springs from a wife’s fear of the Lord and desire to honor Him above all else. Though imperfect, she seeks to become a woman of integrity who is completely devoted to God and her husband.
Putting Your Husband’s Needs First
A godly wife makes her husband’s needs and desires a priority. She looks for ways to serve him, ease his burdens, and bring him good (Proverbs 31:12). This giving spirit reflects Christ’s sacrificial love for the church (Ephesians 5:25).
Practically speaking, godly wives care diligently for their husband’s physical, emotional and spiritual well-being. They seek to understand his needs and personality so they can better support him. With empathy and compassion, they come alongside him through difficulties and trials.
Putting your husband first means considering his perspective when making decisions, even when you disagree. It involves humbly laying down your own rights, preferences or agenda for the greater good of your marriage and family. A godly wife yields her will to God’s purposes.
This kind of servanthood and sacrifice isn’t easy or natural. It requires intentionally dying to selfishness through the power of God’s Spirit. As you depend on Christ daily, He produces His loving, selfless character in you. Your focus shifts from demanding your own way to fulfilling your mission of serving your husband.
In the end, your care, honor and support will not only bring joy to your husband but also enable him to become the man, husband and leader God is calling him to be for your benefit (1 Corinthians 11:7).
Granting Intimacy Freely and Joyfully
An important way a godly wife serves her husband is by granting him sexual intimacy freely, ungrudgingly and joyfully (1 Corinthians 7:3-5). Sex in marriage is a sacred gift from God to be cherished. It unites husband and wife in the deepest level of intimacy, creating oneness and fostering greater love.
A wife has authority over her husband’s body, just as he has authority over hers (1 Corinthians 7:4). For this reason, Scripture warns against depriving one another sexually. When intimacy is given mutually and received gratefully, it cements the bond of marriage.
Granted, a number of factors like health issues, past trauma, difficult stages of life, can make sexual intimacy challenging for a period of time. A godly wife handles these sensitively and truthfully. She gets wise counsel when needed. With prayer, creativity, compromise and grace, she and her husband foster intimacy appropriate for their situation.
But apart from legitimate temporary constraints, a godly wife joyfully receives her husband’s advances. She focuses on the sacred nature of their union and giving pleasure, rather than simply receiving. With a giving spirit, she creates an environment where intimate connection in marriage can thrive.
Respecting Him Always
One of the most important callings of a godly wife is to respect her husband – not only when he behaves respectably but at all times (Ephesians 5:33). This means honoring him as head of the home under Christ’s authority. Scripture is clear that man was created first and the woman was created to be his helper (1 Corinthians 11:3,7-9).
When a wife willingly accepts her husband’s leadership, both receive God’s blessings. Her respect provides a channel for Christ’s loving work in their marriage. But resisting or usurping her husband’s headship brings discord. A wise wife understands these spiritual realities.
Showing respect may involve different actions at different times. It always begins with an attitude of esteem in her heart – choosing to see her husband as God sees him. She builds him up with affirming words and expresses gratitude for his efforts. She teaches the children to honor Daddy. In demeanor, tone and action, she conveys value and care.
This respect continues even when a godly wife disagrees with her husband. She can make an appeal, but not a demand (1 Peter 3:1-2). With straight-forward grace, she discusses issues privately instead of attacking him publicly. She tries to understand his perspective and give him the benefit of the doubt.
Ultimately, her reverence springs from reverence for God. She aligns herself under Christ’s authority and the marriage structure He ordained for blessing. Her humility, wisdom and strength shine as she respects her husband in deed and word.
Pursuing Personal Growth and Godliness
For women to thrive in their high calling as wives, we must be proactive about pursuing personal growth and godliness. The Proverbs 31 woman models this intentional effort to cultivate wisdom, skill, strength, dignity and righteousness.
Above all, a godly wife seeks to know Christ more through regular Bible study, prayer, worship, and Christian fellowship. She hungers for the Word and obeys it (1 Peter 2:2-3). She cherishes her relationship with the Lord as her very life source and strength.
She also seeks the training, counsel and fellowship of other godly women (Titus 2:3-5). Older women have much wisdom to pass on about marriage, homemaking, child-rearing, endurance, godliness, and more. A wise wife humbly receives their discipleship.
In addition, a godly wife makes time to grow in her abilities and gifts – whether learning childcare skills, home organization, healthy cooking, financial management, or how to creatively bless her family. She reads books, takes classes, and seeks input to become a more capable wife and mother.
Most importantly, she cooperates with the sanctifying work of the Holy Spirit. Through the Word, prayer and community, God faithfully shapes her into the woman He created her to be for her good and His glory.
Caring Well for Children and Home
A godly wife takes seriously her vital calling to care for her children and manage the home efficiently. This stewardship requires great effort, wisdom, sacrifice and love – but the rewards are eternal (1 Timothy 5:10; Titus 2:4-5).
At the heart of a godly mother is intense love for her children. She feels the weight of her responsibility to nurture their faith and character. With wisdom and discretion, she trains them through teaching, discipline and her own example (Proverbs 1:8, 6:20). Her aim is guiding them to know, obey and follow the Lord.
Part of this high calling is creating a warm, orderly, welcoming home. A godly wife works diligently with her hands doing all kinds of tasks – cooking nourishing food, washing clothes, budgeting carefully, improving the space. Her heart of service and industry cultivate an environment where her family can rest, grow, and recharge (Proverbs 31:13-15, 21, 27).
Doing this well requires extraordinary strength and commitment. A godly wife relies on the Lord for daily grace and understanding. She fights weariness, gets counsel when overwhelmed, and leans on her husband for support. Most importantly, she clings to Christ, the source of her strength, wisdom, joy, and purpose.
Following Christ with All Her Heart
Despite the wonderful calling and noble vision, wives will fail and struggle along the way. This is inevitable in our humanity. But the beauty is that God redeems and uses even our failures for our growth.
What matters most is not perfection, but perseverance. By God’s grace, a godly wife presses on in her calling despite weaknesses, frustrations, fatigue and disappointments. She holds fast to Christ in the ups and downs. She receives His daily mercies to begin again. His strength perfects her feeble efforts.
Over the decades, the steadfast love of the Lord produces increasing spiritual beauty and maturity in her. The trials bear good fruit. As she walks hand in hand with God through life’s joys and sorrows, she reflects His grace, wisdom and goodness to those around her.
At the end of life, may each wife hear from the Lord: “Well done, my good and faithful servant!” By God’s grace, may she and her husband shine as bright lights in this dark world for the glory of Christ.
