The Bible has a lot to say about brothers and sisters and the relationships between siblings. Here is an overview of some of the key biblical teachings on this topic:
We Are Called to Love Our Siblings
The Bible teaches that we should have love for our brothers and sisters. Jesus said the second greatest commandment is to “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:39). Siblings would certainly fall into the category of “neighbor.” Romans 12:10 tells us to “Be devoted to one another in love. Honor one another above yourselves.” As brothers and sisters, we are called to honor and devote ourselves to each other in love.
Siblings Should Live in Harmony
The Bible encourages siblings to live together in harmony and unity. Psalm 133:1 states “How good and pleasant it is when God’s people live together in unity!” Living in unity can be challenging between brothers and sisters, but we are exhorted to make every effort to maintain peace. Colossians 3:13 says “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.” As siblings, we need to be patient with one another, bearing with each other’s faults, and being quick to forgive.
Older Siblings Should Set a Godly Example
In many biblical accounts, there is special mention of the example an older sibling should set for a younger sibling. For example, in Genesis 4, Abel followed his older brother Cain’s example, but Cain murdered Abel. Older siblings have a responsibility to set a good example and lead their younger siblings towards godliness. 1 Timothy 4:12 says “Don’t let anyone look down on you because you are young, but set an example for the believers in speech, in conduct, in love, in faith and in purity.” Older children should take this admonition seriously and prayerfully set a pattern of godly speech and behavior.
Younger Siblings Should Respect Their Elders
While older siblings should set a godly pattern, the Bible also teaches that younger siblings should respect and honor their older brothers and sisters. 1 Peter 5:5 instructs, “In the same way, you who are younger, submit yourselves to your elders.” Younger children are called to respect and obey their older siblings, as well as their parents. This creates an atmosphere of nurturing care and accountability.
Sibling Rivalry and Conflict is Warned Against
The Bible contains many examples of sibling conflict and rivalry. Genesis 25 tells of Jacob and Esau struggling in Rebekah’s womb. Genesis 27 relates how Jacob deceived Isaac in order to steal Esau’s blessing. Sibling rivalry has existed since the beginning, but Scripture repeatedly warns against it. Romans 12:16 warns us not to be proud but to “live in harmony with one another. Do not be proud, but be willing to associate with people of low position. Do not be conceited.” As siblings, we need to guard our hearts against jealousy, pride, and bitterness towards one another.
Siblings Share a Special Bond and Calling
While siblings may have conflict, the Bible also portrays the special connection brothers and sisters share. Biological siblings share the same earthly father and mother. But all believers in Christ share the same Heavenly Father. In Christ, we are adopted into the family of God together (Romans 8:15-17). This shared spiritual life creates a special bond between siblings in Christ. Throughout Scripture, we see siblings laboring together in ministry. Siblings like Peter and Andrew were called together by Jesus (Matthew 4:18-20). Brothers and sisters can spur each other on toward deeper faith and acts of service.
Siblings Should Care for Each Other’s Needs
The Bible gives practical instruction that siblings should look out for each other’s daily needs. 1 John 3:17 asks, “If anyone has material possessions and sees a brother or sister in need but has no pity on them, how can the love of God be in that person?” Caring for siblings’ needs reflects the love of Christ. Paul also commends sibling caregiving in 1 Timothy 5:4 saying, “But if a widow has children or grandchildren, these should learn first of all to put their religion into practice by caring for their own family and so repaying their parents and grandparents, for this is pleasing to God.” Brothers and sisters can practice selfless biblical love by caring for one another.
Sibling Relationships Can Reflect Christ’s Redeeming Love
Though marred by sin, sibling relationships can also point to the greater redemptive love of Jesus. Jesus left his heavenly home to save his spiritual brothers and sisters: “For whoever does the will of my Father in heaven is my brother and sister and mother” (Matthew 12:50). When sibling relationships are characterized by service, forgiveness, and sacrificial love, it can echo the unconditional love of Christ. As 1 John 4:11 says, “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.” Our selfless sibling love can mirror the magnificent love of our Savior.
Godly Siblings Can Encourage Each Other’s Faith
Siblings who walk closely with the Lord can spur each other on to greater faith. When Moses was frightened to lead Israel out of Egypt, his brother Aaron came alongside him (Exodus 4:14). Likewise, our godly brothers and sisters can support us, pray for us, and encourage us in the Lord. The book of Acts tells of the encouragement Barnabas provided to his cousin Mark after Mark deserted Paul (Acts 15:36-39). Barnabas didn’t give up on Mark but assisted him in becoming useful in ministry again. Through edification and accountability, siblings can help each other grow.
Sibling Relationships Continue into Eternity
Death does not sever the unique bond between brothers and sisters. While marriage ends at death (Matthew 22:30), the family of God in Christ is eternal. Siblings who die in the Lord will be reunited with each other forever. 1 Thessalonians 4:13-18 provides comfort that departed believers will be resurrected when Christ returns. This hope of eternal life together gives perspective to earthly sibling relationships. As 1 Corinthians 13:12 says, “For now we see only a reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.” The joys of sibling relationships are only a glimpse of the perfect fellowship to come.
Examples of Healthy Sibling Relationships
The Bible provides many examples of siblings who enjoyed healthy, loving relationships characterized by mutuality and affection. For example:
– Mary, Martha, and Lazarus (John 11) – This brother and these sisters shared a deep bond of love and friendship. When Lazarus died, his sisters grieved intensely, knowing the joy of his friendship.
– Priscilla and Aquila (Acts 18, Romans 16:3) – This sister and brother worked together as tentmakers and also came alongside Paul in gospel ministry. Their partnership in faith is commended.
– Joseph and Benjamin (Genesis) – Joseph demonstrated selfless love for his younger brother Benjamin after being separated from him for years. He was determined to defend and provide for Benjamin.
These examples illustrate how godly siblings can spur each other’s faith, care for each others’ needs, and devote themselves to each other in love, as Scripture commands.
Biblical Examples of Unhealthy Sibling Relationships
While positive role models exist, the Bible also contains tragic examples of broken sibling relationships resulting from jealousy, unforgiveness, favoritism, and anger. For example:
– Cain and Abel (Genesis 4) – Cain’s jealousy led him to murder his righteous brother Abel, illustrating the danger of unchecked envy.
– Jacob and Esau (Genesis 25-33) – Rivalry over birthright and blessing bred longstanding bitterness between these twin brothers.
– Joseph and His Brothers (Genesis 37) – Favoritism and jealousy incited Joseph’s brothers to sell him into slavery in Egypt.
– Amnon and Tamar (2 Samuel 13) – Amnon’s lust for his half-sister Tamar led him to assault and reject her, violating sibling bonds.
These sorrowful examples provide a warning against unchecked anger, unforgiveness, and sexual immorality that can rupture sibling relationships. They underscore the need for repentance, restraint, and redemption to break destructive cycles.
Principles for Honoring God as Brothers and Sisters
In summary, here are some key principles for honoring God through healthy sibling relationships:
– Love each other deeply with Christlike sacrifice (John 15:12, 1 John 4:11)
– Pursue unity and harmony, avoiding pride and rivalry (Psalm 133:1, Romans 12:16)
– Older siblings set a godly example; younger siblings respect elders (1 Timothy 4:12, 1 Peter 5:5)
– Bear each other’s burdens, care for each other’s needs (Galatians 6:2, 1 John 3:17)
– Be patient and kind, forgiving quickly, building each other up (Ephesians 4:32, 1 Thessalonians 5:11)
– Point each other to Christ through word and deed (Matthew 5:16, Hebrews 10:24)
By applying these Scriptural principles, siblings can experience joyful relationships that honor the Lord. While conflict happens, God’s love and redemption can powerfully restore broken sibling bonds.
